Thursday, July 28, 2011

living the dream

via absolutely beautiful things
Living the dream is what I used to do.  Unemployment might qualify to some as living the dream, since I don't have to report to some job that I hate every day.  But watching my bank account dwindle away and still having bills to pay isn't fun. And applying to jobs I'm overqualified for and not hearing back doesn't exactly make me happy.  In fact, it makes me pretty sad.

fish tacos from my father's daughter by gwyneth paltrow via coco+kelley
I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  I can no longer stand this feeling of being trapped.  Of feeling helpless day in and day out.  Of wondering when what I've done and what I do is finally going to be good enough to get me recognized.  To get me a job.  I mean I'm not asking for much here:  just something that pays me more than I made in high school and maybe offers me health insurance too?  I mean, hell, I'd even take what I made in high school at this point.

raspberry jam with mint and lavender from katy elliott

The other day I had this epiphany.  Nobody is going to hand me the life I want to live on a silver platter.  Funny how that works, huh?  I know I'm working hard to find a job.  But I'm still pretty bummed.  The one thing that has been making me feel better lately is escaping my life by reading my favorite blogs and writing on this one.  When I read those beautiful blogs and dream of my life being like the writers', well, I just dream about it.  But why not make it happen?  Why not enact this change and make that my life too?  What am I waiting for?  Just because I don't have thousands of followers doesn't mean I can't make delicious jam.  Just because I don't have advertisements on my blog doesn't mean I don't know how to create a beautiful tablescape.  So, today I am officially taking my life back into my own hands and starting to live the dream...my dream.  Even if I have to do it frugally.

2 comments:

  1. I love this. There is no doubt in my mind that you will do something magnificent. xo

    ReplyDelete